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We are Survivors by Caterina Giammarresi

1 in every 3 women will be affected by Violence Against Women and Girls (VAWG) in their lifetime. VAWG is defined as “any act of gender-based violence that results in, or is likely to result in, physical, sexual, or psychological harm or suffering to women, including threats of such acts, coercion, and arbitrary deprivation of liberty, whether occurring in public or private life.” This includes, domestic violence, stalking, sexual harassment, sexual exploitation, rape, trafficking, forced marriage, female genital mutilation, and crimes committed in the name of honour.

It is never acceptable for anyone to cause you harm or suffering and there is help available for you. If you are worried about violence from your partner, ex-partner, family member, or anyone else, you can call 03000 120 213 for advice and support. If you are in immediate danger, always phone the police on 999.

In Haringey we are working towards a Coordinated Community Response to end Violence Against Women and Girls. We want to raise awareness about the issues affecting the women and girls in our communities and work together to challenge the mentalities and behaviours that make VAWG possible by training local VAWG Champions and identifying VAWG Safe Spaces and Community Initiatives where survivors can be supported. 

Learn More

 If you as an individual or your local business or organisation want to find out more about how you can

get involved, please email VAWG@haringey.gov.uk

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Holiday time you are not alone by Mari Lavelle-Hill

The festive season can be a difficult time of year for everyone. Added expensive, extra

planning adds pressure for us to really truly enjoy ourselves! On top of that, there is often the ever-complicated family dynamics to navigate and a tendency to over-indulge with food and alcohol.

For many of us , these stresses are heightened by our mental health. It’s hard to feel the joy

and cheer promised when we’re feeling depressed lonely and left out at the Christmas party

if we don’t drink. We miss that sense of belonging if we don’t have family or friends to spend

the holidays with to achieve that ‘perfect Christmas’ (which all the adverts on TV promise us)

when even our day-to-day reality makes us feel overwhelmed.


In fact, National MIND reported that in 2016, “Over a quarter of people feel the pressure to

have the ‘perfect Christmas’ (28%), increasing to half of those with a mental health problem

(48%).” Mind in Haringey would like everyone to know that it’s OK not to be OK at Christmas.

There is support available to you. There are people you can talk to. There are places where

you can spend the day. Look after yourself and be kind to yourself this Christmas.

For help and support at Christmas, nationally and locally:


Call the Samaritans on 116 123 Join Elefriends, an online supportive community set up by MIND: elefriends.org.uk

Join Union Church in Crouch End for a free Christmas day lunch.

To RSVP: call 0208 341 3918 or email christmas@unionccc.org.uk


Learn More

 

VOLUNTEER with an established local community group charity

www.bridgerenewaltrust.org

Become a Mental Health First Aider

Mental Health First Aid is a training course that teaches people how to identify, understand

and support someone who may be experiencing a mental health issue.

MHFA won’t teach you to be a therapist, however, it will teach you how to listen effectively.

To book a place on a Adult 2 day MHFA FREE course contact 0208 340 2474

admin@mih.org.uk

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Listening Corner

We see you

“Be Pastor Marjorie Esomowei, co-pastor of Triumphant Church International in

Tottenham, north London had a birthday celebration like no other - she spent it providing

pampering and dinner for homeless women.

About 40 women of all races and ages, some with their children, attended the birthday

celebrations held at the church

The women enjoyed manicures, facials, hair styling, make-overs and massages provided

by volunteers who donated their time. They received free clothes and had a birthday meal.

Afterwards they were given a gift bag of toiletries which included toothpaste, deodorant,

sanitary towels and more.

Volunteers included Zereena Afflick, who provided free manicures. She knows what it’s like

to be homeless, having had the experience herself, and was keen to give back. She said,

“The day has been amazing. It’s been really nice to see every come together for a really

good cause and to share their talents and their gifts with others to bless them. I like things

like this to do with community and building up women as well.

And birthday woman Pastor Marjorie enjoyed her day. She said, “It was awesome. The

day was very relaxed, well planned, the women knew what they wanted. You could see the

transformation that happened. I think the women were pleased and if they were pleased, I

am too.”


Learn More

 There are plans to hold others.

TCI The Triumphant Church International

136 West Green Road

London N15 5AD

Contact: 0208 800 6001 - 0208 712 5146

Listening Corner

New Parents, Depression, and the Myth of the ‘Instant Bond’ Jo & Shelley, Little Signers Club

The depression which can affect us as new parents is a bleak, overwhelming and debilitating

black hole. Laughter, smiles, eye contact and engagement are so hard to offer a new-born

when you are in the grips of depression, but these essential elements of communication

form the basis of cognitive development. For parents struggling with depression, forming a

bond with your baby can feel impossible, adding to feelings of guilt and inadequacy. Here are

five simple activities which can help you establish bonding and attachment with your baby:

SING.... nursery rhymes, songs on the radio, songs from your childhood. Singing helps

children to develop syntax and rhythm, attunes them to yourvoice and it releases hormones

in adults to boost your mood.

TALK.... to your baby. Not baby talk, but general chat about what you’re doing. Talking helps

your little one hear your voice and begin to pick out language sounds and patterns.

CUDDLE.... The more time you can spend with your little one just being calm and close

together, will do more for their development, and your mental health, than almost any other

thing.

EYE CONTACT.... Put screens away and spend time focussing on your little one, watching

their expressions, listening to their babbles. Just 10 minutes a day can make a difference.

SIGN.... Using baby sign helps you practice all of these skills in a positive, supportive

environment, plus it helps you understand and meet your baby’s needs much more easily,

reducing frustration and tears all round.

‘At a time when my children needed me the most, I was almost unavailable but day by day,

the depression receded and signing gave me a wonderful connection and great interaction

with my girls as well as a path back to instinctive, responsive parenting and fun’. -

baby signing Mum.

For more support for parents

affected by new-parent depression

contact www.bluebellcare.org

Want to know more about baby

signing? Book on to Jo’s FREE

‘Signing for Baby-carer Bonding’

Workshop here:

https://hoop.co.uk/go/i9dwi3/

Or contact Jo for more information:

jo@littlesignersclub.co.uk

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Listening Corner

THE SILENCE VOICE OF RECOVERY

 

My name is Jengis, and I’m an alcoholic addict, I have been in recovery over 7 years without

having a drink or drugs. I do fellowship meetings at the Shine over a year ago we managed

to start an AA meeting here and the meeting is thriving and very helpful. A lot of people are

coming to the meetings, between 20 to 40 people sometimes.

The Shine hosts an AA Group, this is an anonymous group for alcoholics open to everyone

struggling with addiction. The only requirement to join the group is the desire to stop drinking.

At the moment at the Shine I am the trustee with the alarm and door keys, I’ve been trusted,

I had a chance to be trusted once in my live. I’m a treasurer here, we are self-supporting

through our own contributions, nothing comes from outside, we are not affiliated with any

outside organizations, and does not wish to engage with any controversies.

I have a history of crime, and using drink and drugs, most of my life. I used to live in

Tottenham and Wood Green and it was very rough for me during them times. This is a

chance for me to give back to society through a service to share my experience and to be

clean and sober, there are a lot of people that we can help and attract by our experiences

because they can see how it worked for us. This is a different kind of commitment and no

one judges each other, we commit every week as a group, the reason why I do what I do is

because I’m giving back to society, because I took a lot before and now I want to give back.

I do a lot of voluntary work for different organizations, NHS and others but the Shine is

different is really my passion, because it helps people from the streets.

We had no hope before, to hear someone who had been in the same position and now is

clean and sober motivates us to stop drinking or taking drugs. Peer support comes into play

here, when someone else’s experience can benefit someone else.Alcoholics anonymous is a

fellowship where men and woman who share their experience strength and hope with each

other to recover from alcoholism, the fellowship is to help them to stop drinking, there are

no dues or fees for membership, we are self-supporting through our own contributions AA

is not allied with any sect, denomination, politics or institutions.I feel uplifted and hopeful to

come to the meetings, as we help each other to recover from mind, body and soul.

I am proof of that, I completely changed, I haven’t been in prison since I stop drinking and

taking drugs over 7 year ago. I went into prison on many occasions, consequences of drinks

and drugs. My children could not stop me from drinking and drugging although I tried for

them. Is nice to see new people coming in and start to get well.

Kevin Farrell

K.Farrell@blenheimcdp.org.uk

Sofia Carreiro

sofiacarreiro@builonbelief.org.uk

89-91 Turnpike Lane, N8 0DY London

www.shineharingey.org.uk

M: 07944 664 187

AA Meetings

Shine – Thursdays at 7:30pm to 9pm

07498 189 8324

Grove Drug service: 020 8826 2400

Haga Alcohol Service: 020 8800 6999

Insight platform under 25’s Service: 020 8493 8525

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Winter food and housing support in Haringey By Ashley Lydiate from Edible London

We may have had an unusually warm autumn this year, but the temperature is set to really drop soon. With this is mind, it is crucial that we, as a community, look to help those around us without a roof over their heads or who are on a highly restrictive budget. Winter is a testing time for theseindividuals and families who will need help to find bedding, suitable clothing and enough, wholesome and substantial food to eat. Although the number of homeless and those on restricted budgets is on the rise in Haringey; at the same time, there is also a growing number of community groups and organizations involved in helping.

Edible London – a food growing and surplus distribution group based at Wolves Lane Horticultural Centre – is one such organization. Within 6 months of starting up, Edible London have had a hand in feeding over 1000 homeless and vulnerable individuals. Working with groups such as FEAST With Us and Food Not Bombs they distribute organically grown produce from their own greenhouses along with surplus food collected from local supermarkets to groups who cook up and serve free meals for those who need them. Head to www.ediblelondon.weebly.com to find out more or watch the interview with Sunny the founder on the 4u2 website.

Whether you can help or need assistance yourself, there are a few centres you can donate to, volunteer with or request help from. Some you will need a foodbank voucher or a referral to be eligible. There’s a few listed below or head to www.haringey.foodbank.org.uk for more info.

Comminity CookUp Eric Allin Centre, Kenneth Robbins House, Northumberland Grove London N17 0QA - Thursday between 1-4pm-arriveat 12 Contact Allison 07734145375. All donations welcome.

Dominion Centre (Wed @ 5-9pm) - 9 High Rd, Wood Green, London N22 6DS

The Selby Centre (Thurs @ 6-8pm + Sat 10am-12pm) - Selby Rd, Tottenham, London N17 8JL

Gospel Centre (Tues @ 18:30-20:30 + Sun 11:30-13:00) - Wightman Road (Corner Raleigh Road), London, N8 0LT

To get a voucher for these foodbanks, call 07460 519019 or email info@haringey.foodbank.org.uk to organise a meeting with the referral agency.

CARIS Haringey - St Philip’s Church, Philip Lane, London N15 4HJ Professionals can head to http://carisharingey.org.uk/referral to refer families for their services.

St Mungo’s - Head to https://www.mungos.org to find out how to use there services or be of service 

St Edmunds Church (Fri) - 115 Hertford Road, Edmonton, London. N9 7EN UK

There should really be no reason for anyone to go hungry this winter. There are always people to turn to and there are plenty of ways you can help. So, step up to the plate, donate, and help spread the warmth and community spirit this year.

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